7 Shades of Love

Couple with Heart and ArrowValentine’s Day movies should be about true love. But you don't have to look far to find one that portrays exactly the opposite. Another quieter film launch might be more like the real deal. But how can you tell?

Want to avoid falling for the fakes? Watch for these 7 shades of true love:

True love is patient. It doesn’t make pushy demands, hurry you into half-baked decisions, or rush you into bed. True love gives you time and space: to grow, to plan wisely, and to be sure of who you are.

True love is kind. This means love involves actions, not just emotions. Love hears your needs, and tries to meet them. It always wants to help you, not hurt you. Love’s deeds are thoughtful, considerate, and just plain nice.

True love isn’t jealous, boastful, or proud, or self-serving. Love is so focused on being nice to you that it doesn’t spend time building itself a fan club. Think about that. How can a person love you if he is too busy making sure he gets everything he feels he deserves? If he’s his own favorite person, there’s no room for you in his heart. True love treats you like royalty, not a trophy or a slave.

True love has a long fuse and a short memory. When offended, love’s patience lends it the hope that together you can resolve your conflict. So it doesn’t automatically explode when you two run into trouble. And it doesn’t hold grudges.

True love celebrates the good, not the bad. Love enjoys things like gentleness, honesty, commitment, praise. It shuns things like cruelty, lying, broken promises, and put-downs. Love never gets pleasure by causing someone pain.

True love protects. Love will guard the health and safety of your mind, body, and spirit. It will encourage and support you as you face life’s challenges. It will not draw you into behavior that will harm you, because love knows you are a treasure.

True love lasts. True love springs from a decision: a decision to be good to another person. Because it’s not based on feelings alone, it will withstand the changes time brings. (Click here to listen to a great story on this.) Lust dies down when your looks alter; love keeps right on loving. Selfishness seeks greener pastures; love feeds on loyalty. Counterfeits of love create uncertainty and fear. True love is dependable and trustworthy, creating peace and stability.

To find true love you’ll need to take your time getting to really know a person, without letting sex get in the way. Since love isn’t just sexual, you can often see its 7 shades in the way a person treats his friends and family.

And don’t miss this: you should practice true love yourself. Begin by truly loving the people who are already in your life. Someone else may be watching for the 7 shades of love in you. Because he knows what you know:

True love is as rare as a fine diamond. So take time to find a real one. The fakes are way too expensive.

True love is a rare diamond. Take time to find a real one. The fakes are way too expensive. Click To Tweet

Wondering if you’ve fallen into a fake love and need help getting out?
Call, text, or stop in at Choices Pregnancy Center.
We’ll sit and listen to your story—whether or not you’re pregnant—
and help you think through what to do.