Guys, what does “being a man” look like to you?
Some guys think:
- A real man doesn’t cry.
- A real man is tough.
- A real man is [bigger, better, stronger, faster, smarter, or…] than the next guy.
- A real man has all the gear he needs.
- A real man never lets anybody put him down.
- A real man can [fix the car, repair plumbing, handle computer problems, or…]
How’s That Working for You?
There are an awful lot of guys who have bought into all those beliefs. They live as if they always have to prove something to somebody. (Usually themselves. Or other guys. Or their dad.)
But all that “proving something” creates conflict with most of the people in their lives. Then the guys are stumped when their relationships fall apart. They feel angry inside or frustrated. And they can’t figure out why.
Are you one of those guys?
It Doesn't Have to Be That Way
What if you found out that real men are guided by four key principles?
What if following those principles could lead you to deeper satisfaction with yourself and your relationships?
Would you follow those four principles--even if was going to be hard?
If you're up for the challenge, then keep reading. We asked Henry Meyers—local dad, husband, pastor, and former high school agriculture teacher—what has worked for the successful men he has mentored. Here's what he had to say.
Four Principles of Manhood
Meyers teaches guys four principles drawn from Men’s Fraternity, a man-building program. Listen to how he describes those principles.
- Reject Passivity. Whether due to fear or a lack of healthy role models, too many guys make passivity their default mode. Meyers said, “When it’s time to step up and take responsibility, they just go passive, deferring to their girlfriends or wives.” Real men leave that habit behind.
- Accept Responsibility. Real men don't pass the buck. “Say my kid's crying,” Meyers said. “Instead of rolling over and pretending I’m asleep, what would it mean for me to accept responsibility? I'd tell myself, ‘I should get up. This is my child, I should take a turn caring for him.’”
- Lead Courageously. Real men abandon the easy route to tackle the uphill climb toward strong leadership. That move takes a lot of courage. Courage that will eventually pay off big time. Guys that do this quit being what Meyers called “boys that shave” and grow into real men.
- Invest Eternally. “Think of your life's investments--financially, with time, with talents,” Meyers said. “You're always making investments. When you look beyond yourself, that's an eternal perspective. Once you have a child, what about that child's future? Stop to think, ‘What investment can I make to give that child a good future, versus the choices I make today that set that child up for a not-good future?’”
Ask for Directions
Living by these four principles takes guts. We're talking about totally re-vamping how you've lived out your view of manhood for years. To make that happen, you're going to need serious support.
If you're ready to learn how to start rejecting passivity, accepting responsibility, leading courageously, and investing eternally, let us know. At Choices Pregnancy Center, one of our key services is connecting men and women with the people who can help them best. We'd love to do that for you.
We look forward to seeing more real men in our community.