How to Start Over: Build Better Relationships This Year

Start over with new habits that lead to your goal of better relationships this year.Are you ready to dump the drama of relationships based more on sex than friendship? Ready to treat your sexuality as a treasure, instead of a dollar store deal?

You can make a fresh start now.

Welcome to a whole new year!

New Year, New You

Whether you’re reading this on New Year’s Eve or in the middle of summer, the next 365 days can be a brand new year. The first year of your new lifestyle.

Sure, you can’t completely erase the past. But you can choose to leave it behind. With motivation, clear goals, and a little help from your friends, you can live a happier, healthier life than you’ve lived before. You can reset your reputation, develop new habits, and learn to love your life.

So if you’re one of the many people who have decided to take back control of your sexuality, we’re here to cheer you on. For starters, we want to give you three tips for making your new year’s resolution happen. (And don’t miss the freebie we created for you at the end of the article.)

#1: Identify what’s at stake.

Changing habits is hard. When the old, familiar lifestyle tries to drag you down, you’ll need good, strong reasons to hang onto your new habits. So take a minute to think about what’s at stake for you. Why do you want to live differently now? What will you gain?

See if some of these reasons match yours:

Can you suggest other reasons?

#2: Write it down – positively and specifically.

Goal-setting gurus teach that putting your goal on paper makes achieving it more likely. So write your goal out, using positive, specific language about exactly what you want to do.

Here are some suggestions to get your thoughts going:

  • I will build my next relationship on real friendship instead of just settling for sex.
  • The next time I have sex will be on my wedding night.
  • I will save my body for my future spouse.

(Read on to download our free card to record your goal.)

#3: Enlist a support network.

Once you’ve identified your reasons for changing your life around, and you’ve written out your plan, there’s one more very important thing you need to do. Gather a fan club: a support network of friends who will cheer you on toward your goal. Can you tell your current friends about your resolve to start over? If not, it may be time to find better friends. (Some of the old ones may re-join you later, when they see the difference your new lifestyle makes.)

Look for people who share your determination to treat sex as the special gift it is. That includes us, here, at Choices Pregnancy Center. You don’t need to be pregnant to come talk with us. Part of our mission is to support you in avoiding sexual risk and developing healthy relationships.

If you want to sit down with someone who will listen and help you move forward in your new life, call or text us to set up a get-together. We offer free Life Coaching sessions, as well as free one-on-one mentoring in developing healthy relationships and other life skills.

And here’s a gift to get you started…

Click on the image below to download a Goal Reminder card. Print out this card as many times as you like: one for you, and one for each of your friends. Keep it handy—inside your phone case, in your purse or pocket—and use it to help you stick to your new habits this year.

So, what are your other great reasons to build relationships on a better foundation than sex?

Help someone else by sharing here what you’ve discovered.